Parents should be involved with their teen's therapy if they expect a good outcome that includes an improved relationship. Some parents have the idea that they can send their troubled teen to a residential therapy center and get back a child who automatically falls into a normal relationship. Parents who do this are in for a surprise. At best, the relationship may be cordial and at least, it will still be stormy. They can't expect a changed attitude toward them if they have done nothing to help the teen work through their relationship issues.
For the best results, the parents and teens should be guided by a reputable therapist. Too much involvement too soon and the teen shuts down or becomes angry. Too little for too long and the teen feels the parents don't care enough. It can differ for each teen so a good therapist who knows how and when parents should step in is needed. When parents work with the therapist, their relationship with their child can be rebuilt. It may not be the same as it was when the child was younger but it can be stronger.
In the beginning, parents may be limited to brief phone calls but will become more frequent, longer and include visits as the teen progresses through therapy. During this time, parents can benefit from therapy themselves to learn how to better relate to their child in a firm but nonjudgmental manner. Discipline is necessary for all children, even and maybe especially for troubled teens. Learning how to discipline in a way that preserves the trust between parent and child is a skill many parent need to learn.
As the teen nears the end of the therapy regimen, parents will be closely involved as well the family as a whole. Other relatives may also be brought in during this time also. Each member of the family needs to feel comfortable relating to the teen in a way that puts them all at ease so tensions don't build again. Prior to this point, parents should be able to identify which relatives will be able to put the teen's past behind them to build a newer, better relationship and which relatives may not be able to do this. Relatives who will also bring up past issues may not be the best people for the teen to be around for some time.
If the troubled teen's parent are divorced, working on ways to co-parent without being divisive is essential. The parents need to present a unified front for the child's sake and leave their differences behind. After all, which is more important, their own desires or their child's needs?
